


A field day

by stamets



Category: Broadchurch
Genre: Coming Out, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, I LOVE HER SO MUCH, I'm totally not writing this as therapy for my own coming out, M/M, So Much Friendship, Trans!Hardy, bi!alec, but some angsty maybe?, coming to terms with things, ellie being the biggest ally, it gets fluffier, nb!ellie, pan!ellie, snoft, this can also be read as a good omens au, this gets exponentially softer over time, yeet
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-22
Updated: 2019-08-30
Packaged: 2020-07-10 10:15:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,490
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19904086
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stamets/pseuds/stamets
Summary: After Ellie takes Alec to Pride, they both start to become more comfortable with their genders and sexualities. Then one day a handsome new colleague shows up.Podfic at the end!





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is just a first draft, so please leave any comments if you have suggestions uwu

“Oh we should get some of those flags!” Ellie pointed at a stand while enthusiastically smiling at Alec.

“No, Miller, what have I told you? This is _just_ a one day thing, after today I don’t want to hear about it. I didn’t even know Broadchurch Pride existed. It’s really not that- STOP IT!”

He frowned distressed at the rainbow flag Ellie had draped around his shoulders.

“What? You don’t like it?” Ellie grinned.

Alec huffed and mumbled something.

“What was that?”

He grumbled softly. “I said, I prefer the other one.” He nodded apprehensively at a pink-purple-blue flag.

Ellie started beaming. “Then let’s get you that one!” She turned to the seller. “One bi flag, and a pan one as well, please.”

“And… this one too.” Alec held up a trans flag, trying to hide his face.

Ellie was taken aback for a second. “You never told me you were trans.”

“There was no need. Let’s just...get on with it.” He blushed aggressively.

“Alright. Just these three then, thank you.” Ellie handed over the money as Alec immediately stuffed the flags in her backpack.

“What are you doing? You should wear them, like a cape!” She pulled them out again and wrapped the pan flag around her. “Don’t I look pretty?”

“Hmph.”

“Come on, don’t be afraid. Be proud of yourself.”

“I’m not!”

“Proud of yourself?”

“Afraid!”

“Then why don’t you want to wear them?”

“I’m- alright, _fine_.”

He awkwardly hung the bi flag around his shoulders. “I can’t wear both of them.”

“Yes you can.” Ellie carefully circled Alec to attach the trans flag to his waist.

“There you go. You look STUNNING.” She smiled widely.

“I really don’t. Let’s just… go back to the police station. And DON’T-“

“Too late.” Ellie had already taken a picture of the two of them. “This’ll be perfect in your office. Might brighten it up a little.”

Alec sighed, and Ellie nudged him.

“You’ve taken a big step today. I’m proud of you.”

He wanted to say something, but his words got stuck somewhere along the way. Instead he desperately tried to fight back the tears that welled up in his eyes. Ellie gave him some time to recover.

“I’ll give you a lift home,” she said. He just nodded.


	2. the aftermath

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for this turning angsty all of a sudden lmao

It was the first day of summer break. Not that detectives really had a break, but they would be even more understaffed than they had been before. In fact, Hardy and Miller were the only ones in the precinct at the moment, mindlessly doing anything but policework. Ellie was doodling a small dog on a piece of old scrap paper, and Alec was tapping the rhythm of a non-existent song on a mug half-full with cold tea.

“Remind me why we’re here?” Ellie asked.

“Just. Because.”

“Eh.”

More silence passed.

“D’you still have that picture?” Ellie asked.

“What picture?” Alec looked up from his “worst cop in Britain” mug.

“The one of us at Pride last week. You looked rather happy in that one.”

“Oh. Right. It’s probably… somewhere,” Alec frowned.

Ellie had given him a printed and framed copy of the photo she’d taken. He’d put it on his desk at home, but of course he wasn’t going to tell Ellie that. Couldn’t have her thinking he’d actually enjoyed being at Pride, could he? Besides, he wanted to steer away from the subject. The tension about him coming out as trans had been hanging in the air between them all week, and neither of them had initiated a conversation about it.

Deep down, Alec realized that his lack of desire to talk about it was fuelled by anxiety. He knew that Ellie would support him, like she’d done many times before, even during his worst days. However, the fact that Ellie had shown no sign of bringing it up after last week, made him fear that perhaps she was ignoring the issue because she didn’t want it to exist. He couldn’t risk losing his best and only friend in Broadchurch, even if it meant staying mostly closeted.

Ellie, on the other hand, realized that Alec was going through something right now, and she wanted to give him all the time he needed to work it out. When he was ready to talk about it, she thought, he would approach her.

He swallowed and wiped away some sweat from his forehead, looking away as Ellie observed him.

“I very much liked it,” Ellie tried.

Alec looked up. “You did?”

Ellie nodded. “The colours suited you. No, really.” She continued drawing the dog, this time with pink and blue pens.

Alec stared at her, trying to find his voice. Was this Ellie telling him it was okay? His anxiety told him no, but his hope told him yes, this is it, go for it. Should he? Or was it too soon? But no, he was quite literally sick of being uncertain.

The sweat continued to build up, and suddenly he started trembling. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. The image of Ellie rushing towards him and reaching for her phone crossed his eyes just barely. He felt a strange sense of relief as he passed out. Maybe everything will go away now, he thought.


	3. truth hurts

He woke up to pacing footsteps.

“Oh finally, you’re back. I got you strawberries.”

Alec couldn’t help but grin through the headache. “They have seeds in them. I might choke.”

“Just eat them. They’ll be good for you.”

Alec smirked, despite the pain. “Did I have a another heart attack?”

Ellie looked away from the briefest time, trying to hide a tear that had welled up in the corner of her eye. “Yes, first an anxiety attack, then a heart attack. But they said you’re going to be fine. And we don’t have a case right now, so you can actually stay at the hospital to recover.” She looked at him with eyes that said ‘if you don’t take your rest, I can and will strangle you’.

He nodded and weighed a strawberry in his hand. “Thanks.”

A few moments of silence passed as Ellie stood up to gaze outside the window. It was a nice day, a little hot perhaps. A couple of tourists walked the streets, with their cameras and Google maps, on their way to the famous (and recently infamous) cliffs. They were taking some photos of the leftovers of Pride: a torn flag, some confetti here and there. It all looked rather grim now, although that could just be her projecting onto them.

She turned back to her friend, who’d been following her with his eyes.

“Are you going to eat that?” She nodded towards the still uneaten strawberry in the detective’s hand.

“Miller-“ he sighed deeply, but knew that he felt much calmer this time.

“I’m listening.” She sat down on the edge of the hospital bed.

Alec closed his eyes, and suddenly everything came out.

“I’ve been on testosterone for twelve years. Had voice therapy. Never a surgery, though. The doctors said my heart wouldn’t be able to handle it. A lot of my anxiety was caused by dysphoria, and it never really went away. When I started transitioning, I thought that Daisy would be bullied if I came out, so we sent her to a different school and told nobody that I was trans. I was just a regular father. I suppose that after that… I thought it would only complicate things if I came out.”

Ellie smiled at him. “It’s okay, that makes sense.”

Alec exhaled deeply, feeling so much weight lift from his shoulders. His best friend understood him.

“Why did you decide to tell me?” She asked softly.

He swallowed, suddenly feeling so bare and open. “I’ve been… insecure, I guess, ever since I started transitioning. Just afraid that I’d be ‘found out’, or something, that I was a fa-“

“Oh, stop it, you know that’s bullshit. You are a man, and whatever anyone else thinks of that is completely irrelevant.” Ellie interrupted aggressively. “But, do continue.”

Alec blinked. What would he do without her?

He coughed. “I’ve always kept my distance from people, because I thought they’d push me away once they found out. Or that I wasn’t what they were looking for, romantically.”

“Is that why you were so keen on not talking with me the first year we knew each other?” She grinned, memories flashing by. He nodded and looked down.

“Believe it or not, I wanted to be your friend. So badly. I hate to admit it, but you seemed like the only funny, reasonable person in this entire town.”

“I didn’t exactly have the same impression of you, but I’m sure you noticed that,” Ellie laughed.

Alec scoffed and looked at her softly. “When… when you told me you were pan, I gained some hope. I debated telling you, but then I realized that even other queer people could be transphobic, and I got another anxiety attack, and, well. But last week, that was different. Just- seeing all these people celebrating and being so proud of themselves and each other… I wanted nothing more than to be part of it. And for the shortest moment I felt confident enough to- to tell you.” The last words were whispers as he choked up. As he looked up, he was surprised to find Ellie sobbing along, and had to stifle a laugh.

“What have we become?” He asked, jokingly.

Ellie snorted, but when she answered her voice was serious.

“You’re my friend. You can tell me anything, you know that?”

And in that moment, Alec knew that he would.

“Besides, with you being bi and trans and me being pan, we’ve got quite a bit of ground covered. Would be funny if I turned out to be nonbinary or something, now,” Ellie grinned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise the male OC will show up next chapter dkjbndl 
> 
> Thanks so much for reading so far! TRANS RIGHTS!


	4. Fresh feelings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec receives some potentially disturbing news.

"Oh, I think I'm non binary."

Alec nearly spat out his lukewarm hospital tea. "You WHAT?"

"Well, I've been looking up some information, and I suddenly recognised myself in everything. Like 'oh! That's it!'" Ellie smiled brightly, nearly bouncing on her chair.

"That's wonderful, Miller." Alec couldn't help but let some excitement shine through his otherwise stern face. 

"Don't worry about pronouns, I feel quite comfy with the old 'she'."

Alec nodded understandingly. "You'll tell me if that changes?"

"Of course," Ellie beamed.

Then, as a sort of shockwave, it hit Alec. "You were looking up information because you wanted to understand me? What I've been going through?"

Ellie tilted her head. "Of course. That's what friends do, isn't it?"

His immediately felt a lump in his throat. The concept of someone genuinely caring about him was still fresh after all these years of loneliness. A wave of warmth and euphoria went through him, and he could practically feel the serotonin reach his brain. But at the same time, the wall of defenses that had been decades in the making, prevented him from doing what he craved so much right now: giving Ellie a hug and telling her how much he appreciated her being there, and how happy he felt that they could now share the experience of being gender non-conforming. So, he didn't do any of that. 

Instead, he went back to his usual routine. "I think I should get back to the station, do some work."

Ellie's expression changed. "Oh, about that."

"Hm?" Alec's nerves suddenly skyrocketed, as if to warn him for what she was about to say.

"Well... they hired a new detective. Kind of your replacement for the time being, but I have a feeling they'll want to keep him on. I'm sorry, Alec."

He froze and stared at the rests of his tea in silence for a second. 

"Oh," he said softly.

"They're not firing you, I made sure of that. I suppose you'll just have to... work together, or something."

"They didn't think I could do it on my own?"

"It's not that, Alec. They needed someone as a sort of backup, for when things like this happen." She vaguely gestured at his hospital bed.

"What about you? Can't you be the backup?" He tried to conceal the desperation in his voice.

"I've got kids, Alec. I can't take on the work of two people," Ellie sighed.

"Couldn't they at least have made you DI then, instead of another man?" 

Ellie smiled a bit uneasily, then replied in a low voice. "They did. The new guy is a a sergeant, and so are you, now."

Alec shot up, suddenly bright again. To his own surprise, he wasn't even angry that the department demoted him. "You got promoted? I- I don't know what to say, that's great, Miller."

Ellie blinked. "You're not mad at me for taking your job?"

Alec shook his head. "It was about time. You've earned it." 

Ellie breathed out deeply, and a weight fell off her shoulders. She'd been putting off this conversation ever since Alec was hospitalised and the police department made this decision. She remembered how angry she had been a few years ago, when Alec Hardy suddenly showed up to take the Detective Inspector job that she had hoped for for so long, away from her. Now, she couldn't imagine the precinct without him there. Her bosses had first tried to fire Hardy altogether - they saw his most recent breakdown as an excuse to finally consider him a has-been. But they'd made the 'mistake' of asking Ellie Miller to be the new DI, who had immediately threatened to resign if they didn't rehire him immediately. They'd ended up with the compromise she'd just explained to Alec.

"What's he like?" Alec asked. Yes, he was already grumpy about having to deal with a new person, but he felt a lot safer and stronger than before now that he knew for sure that he could rely on Ellie. Secretly, he was glad that he didn't have to be head inspector anymore. The responsibility that came with it hadn't been easy on him recently, and he knew that Miller would be able to handle it much better than him. 

"Oh, you'll like him. He has curls, and he's tall." 

Alec violently raised both of his eyebrows. "Ellie, I swear if this is all a trick to match me with someone, I'm only going to make you microwaved tea from now on."

Ellie's eyes widened playfully. "You WOULDN'T."

"Watch me."

"Okay, fine. This is not all a trick, but coincidentally he really is your type."

"How do you know what my type is?"

"Like I've never seen you use tinder before," Ellie snorted.

"Miller! You can't do that!" Alec replied, only slightly disturbed. He had to admit, she was right. Tall and curly was _definitely_ his type. Oh god.

Then they both burst into laughter, and everything that could be forgiven, was forgiven.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes the new DS is supposed to look like michael sheen (I HAVE MY REASONS, THEY'RE CALLED GOOD OMENS)


	5. A Present

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Alec thinks too much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> C_q_j_a_l_m made a podfic of this! Here's the link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20281381/chapters/48077098 (and thanks again!)
> 
> Sorry for the long pause, everyone! Have an extra long chapter as compensation <3

Alec dragged himself towards the police precinct. He wasn’t feeling particularly excited about starting again. In fact, the promise of a new colleague had caused him to spend the night staring at his wall and hugging his sheets for comfort. But he had to admit that without his work, he would be in a vast nothingness. That reminded him, he should properly thank Ellie for making sure he wasn’t fired. Some flowers maybe, or chocolates?

Stopping by the small grocery store on the way, he quickly picked up a bouquet of a variety of roses. Its rainbow appearance somehow managed to cheer him up considerably, and he carefully stuffed them in between the Tony’s Chocolonely ™ chocolates and the bottle of wine he had also purchased. “Better too much than too little” was his motto for his work and for gifts, and nothing else.

“Good morning.”

“Hrrhng”.

Strolling along, he wished he’d still had his driver’s license so he wouldn’t have to greet any more people on the street.

As he arrived at the police station, he placed the gifts on Ellie’s desk. He was surprised to not see her there, she must be running late. Maybe something with her kids. He groaned and moved back to his own desk, where he sat down to look through the emails he’d missed over the past week. He was, however, quickly interrupted by a shadow falling over his screen. He looked up to find a smiling face appearing from behind the rainbow flower bouquet.

“Hello there! I don’t think we’ve met. I’m Phil.” The smiling face said.

Alec gazed at him for a second, completely confused. He automatically extended his hand for a shake.

“Alec. Hardy,” he replied.

“Thanks for the nice welcoming presents, Alec. I really appreciate it.” Phil gestured at the flowers and other gifts. His voice was low and pleasant, like a deep blue sea.

“Welcoming…” Alec glared at the desk he’d dropped them on. Only now, he noticed that Ellie’s things had been removed from it, and had made way for a new set of office supplies and personal belongings. Ellie must’ve moved to another desk, since she was promoted.

“…Yes, of course, welcoming presents,” he scraped his throat loudly.

“Hey, if you want to join, we’re having a sort of breakfast outside. I got bagels.” Phil lifted a bag of fresh bagels to his face.

“I’ve already had breakfast,” Alec lied. To be fair, he was much too distracted by the other detective’s wild curls to fully notice the bread.

“Oh well. Talk to you later then!” The curled man disappeared behind the precinct’s back doors again.

Alec sank his head into his hands, and glanced at his new colleague’s desk through his fingers. How was he supposed to focus when a soft ball of curls was sitting two metres away from him? And he’d have to listen to that smooth voice at LEAST multiple times a day. Nope. Nope nope nope. He had to find Ellie, she’d know what to do.

He aggressively shoved his chair back to stand up and wiped some sweat from his forehead. She’d been right, Phil was definitely his type when it came to men. And he’d seemed nice, at first sight at least. Most people were nice at first sight, but that didn’t mean they weren’t actually racist transphobes underneath. Oh god, what if Phil was a racist transphobe? He couldn’t possibly allow himself to become attached to a racist transphobe. What if they went for a drink one night and took it to one of their homes and he’d find out that Alec was trans and he would attack him for it and the next morning it’d be all over the news: ‘worst cop in Britain killed in transphobic attack’, and-

Alec quickly discarded the thought. Even the first step in that anxiety fantasy was an impossibility – Phil would never agree to go out with him. He was probably not even single. Or attracted to men at all. No, there were too many uncertainties. And they’d only just met, so what was Alec doing dreaming up a thousand possible scenarios anyway?

The doors opened again, and Phil and Ellie came stumbling back in, laughing.

“Hello Alec! Good to see you back again.” Ellie said enthusiastically, walking up to him. “Phil was just telling me about the gifts you got him. Was very nice of you,” she smiled. Phil nodded in agreement.

Alec’s eyes shifted back and forth between the two, not sure of where to look. “Of course, yes. Uhm. How’s the new job, Miller?”

Ellie pointed proudly at her new badge that read ‘DI Miller’.

“Very nice, thank you. Never knew it would be so easy.”

Alec rolled his eyes.

“And I’m enjoying myself too so far,” Phil chimed in. “Detective Miller has been so kind to show me around. She told me all about you,” he said.

Alec’s eyes moved back to Ellie, accusingly. “Did she now.”

“Yes! Don’t worry, only the embarrassing parts.” Ellie replied. Alec’s eyes widened.

“Just kidding, only good.” Ellie said, and Alec relaxed.

“I’d never tell Phil that you microwave tea all the time,” she continued.

“Ellie!” Alec groaned and facepalmed.

“Microwaving tea?” Phil cackled. “Don’t worry Alec, I’ve seen worse.” He moved his hand up to place it calmingly on Alec’s shoulder, but seemed to remember something mid-air and took it back.

“Well, I better be going back to work. We have an armed burglary case, I believe!” Phil nodded a goodbye at the two detectives and turned around to walk back to his desk.

“I told him you don’t like to be touched casually,” Ellie whispered. She was right, he didn’t, and he was more than grateful she’d mentioned it. He’d probably have frozen to stone, if not worse, if Phil’s hand had made it to his shoulder.

“Those gifts were actually meant for you.” Alec whispered back.

Ellie chuckled. “I’m sure you’re secretly glad he got them.”

Alec frowned.

“Shush, Miller.”

But as he glanced at the new detective, he knew she was right, as always.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 'Phil'... as in 'Aziraphale'? I had to think of something

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [A field day [PODFIC]](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20281381) by [c_q_j_a_l_m](https://archiveofourown.org/users/c_q_j_a_l_m/pseuds/c_q_j_a_l_m)
  * [A field day [PODFIC]](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20281381) by [c_q_j_a_l_m](https://archiveofourown.org/users/c_q_j_a_l_m/pseuds/c_q_j_a_l_m)
  * [A field day [PODFIC]](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20281381) by [c_q_j_a_l_m](https://archiveofourown.org/users/c_q_j_a_l_m/pseuds/c_q_j_a_l_m)




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